Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
