new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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