talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
