oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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