Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
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90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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