her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
