Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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