For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑