i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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