You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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