Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
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But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
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We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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