Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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