Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
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