her vagine was all disorganized.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
