There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
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