dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
