my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
