I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
she told me i tasted like america
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
