So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
