I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
