remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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