That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
i came on her dog
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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