Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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