i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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