I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
