I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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