Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
