we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
