Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Can I color on your dick again?
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
