Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
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