Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
