ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize