Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
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