Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize