god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
