kristin has been a bad kristin
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
