my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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