Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize