And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize