you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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