Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize