? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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