my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize