You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
