I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I can feel your judgement through the phone
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
