Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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