Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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