I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I smell stomach acid.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize
