Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
