and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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